Adoption Movement, No More Tears, & Oh Canada!

First a quick adoption update: we are now #2 in "line" with our agency. Still don't know what that means exactly for a timeframe, but it is movement!! It seemed even more exciting because the family that just received a referral this week was one I know from our Chat Board. They had been waiting since January (we consider ourselves waiting since February, since that is when our paperwork was sent to Russia). Very exciting!

Today was a fantastic day for preschool drop-off. No tears at all!! Natalie was as smiley and chipper as she could be. Again, very exciting!! She was rewarded at pick-up with a little package of Disney princess nail polish and lip gloss. I think she nearly hyper-ventilated. The lip gloss is almost gone from constant applications, and her fingernails are purple and glittery.

In other news, our family and friends from the North will be happy to know that Natalie has been channeling her inner-Canadian lately. I don't know exactly where she picks some of it up. I've caught her saying "Eh?" at the end of sentences lately. I suppose Jim must say it, although I don't notice it when he does. I DO notice when Natalie says it though, the same way I will notice the first time she says "Ya'll". Just one of those things that makes you do a double-take and say "What did you just say?" Then there is her newest favorite phrase "Silly buggers!" I find this one hysterical, while at the same time I worry that this is more vulgar than I know in the UK. I am hoping it is not considered to be a real curse word. She can find more uses for that phrase than you can imagine. We might not be able to travel to the UK for a few years.

And...every time she sings the ABC song she ends saying "Zed!" I do not say Zed. Liam does not say Zed. But Natalie does. There is one alphabet toy that Grandma brought from Canada that sings the song and says Zed, and she must have decided that this toy was saying it the RIGHT way and the rest of us the wrong way. In any case, it will come in handy if she is comparing notes with preschoolers from Canada or the UK. I don't correct her, because Jim also thinks this is the right way. I'll let her choose for herself.

Thanksgiving Early

Instead of complaining about the interminable adoption wait anymore, I have decided to concentrate on being thankful for a few things.

1) I am thankful that we were not traveling during the first weeks of Kindergarten and Preschool. Between adjusting to the earlier to bed and earlier to rise routine, new schools, separation anxieties, car pool, etc., I am so very, very glad that I was around to do this instead of leaving such an overwhelming task to Grandma (although I am sure she could have handled it).

2) I am thankful that Natalie is maturing so much, and she is starting to be helpful and fun. I can actually picture her as a wonderful big sister now, whereas a year or so ago I could only picture her being a very cranky sibling.

3) I am thankful that we are more settled in our new home and neighborhood, and have as good a support system here as we had in Ohio. I think this is due in large part to me staying home with the kids, and this neighborhood having so many moms at home, with very organized playgroups, etc. For about 6 months after we moved, it would have been a very unstable time for a new baby.

4) I am thankful that I've had a year now to adjust to staying at home. It was a HUGE adjustment. At 6 months I was still in shock. At 9 months I was getting the hang of it. At 12 months, I was able to fully enjoy a summer at home with both kids. I am so glad we had that before adding on.

I could go on, but the point is that I am glad we've had some time for us all to mature and grow a bit (at least the kids :-) ). So I am going to try not to complain about wait times. Meanwhile, I have started up my Russian lessons CD again (car pool lane waits are perfect for this), have started scrapbooking Natalie's pictures (shame, shame, shame it has taken this long). And look what I found at the library on sale for ten cents!! It caught my eye as I walked by the other day. Ten cents!! It is a March 1990 issue of National Geographic that is all about Siberia & the Soviet Union! Very interesting. It even has a huge pull-out map of Russia/Soviet Union from 1990. Yes, I know things have changed. Still, how great to have this little snapshot in time to provide some history. It does not necessarily make me want to visit in the middle of winter...but I will put that thought out of my head as I concentrate on the positive. I love National Geographic photographs, too.

Not My Finest Hour

As I approach 40, there are a few things that I apparently still need to learn. Anything, or everything, about car maintenance, for example. Our minivan has an alarm (loud) that sounds when the air in the tires ges too low. It went off the other day. The car kept calling it a Flat Tire, but the air pressure only read about 29 psi. I mentioned to Jim that I was going to take it to the shop to have them filled a bit since there is also a big plastic piece hanging down underneath that needs to be tacked back up (not as bad as it sounds). Jim laughed "Are you kidding? You're going to take it to a shop for air?? Haven't you ever filled up a bike tire? It's just the same!! ha ha ha"

Fast forward...to today... as I stop by a gas station and attempt to fill the tires. It's not exactly like filling a bike tire. Every time I held the hose onto the little...thingy on the tire...I hear that hissssssing sound. After "filling" 2 tires, I did see a button that said Push For Air. So I pushed it. And tried 2 more tires. Hisssss.. I have the feeling it's not working, but still I soldier on. When I squeeze the handle to make the little gauge pop out, it doesn't look like the numbers are any bigger. I drive away, and check the screen that shows tire pressure...and one of them is now down to 21 psi... So I drive back and call Jim and curse like a sailor. I really just want him to tell me how to fill them, but he says "I'll be there in 5 minutes." Slow day at work, and I suspect he can't wait to see this in person. Turns out, that handle should have been squeezed the whole time in order to let the air out of the hose. I don't understand why they can't post simple instructions on the machines. But now Jim at least has a story to tell...every time we drive by the gas station...on the way to soccer practice, I think he is going to remind the kids, "And that spot right there is where I found your mother systematically letting all the air out of her tires. I thought maybe she would stop at the first one, but for some reason she did all four."

To set the record straight, I did all four because I was still clinging to the hope that I was doing it right. I'm sure there are other parallels here I could draw, but I am just too embarrassed by it all right now to do that.

Finally, the Backpack

Finally, the backpack picture. We were told to bring a "large" backpack, so yes, the backpack is as big as the girl.

Adoption update: There appears to have been slight movement in the waiting "line" at our agency. I am speculating that we are now about #3 in line, and might hear something in November...but who is counting. (ME!)

A Good Thing

Natalie has contracted her first illness since the start of preschool. She's had a runny nose since pretty much the first day of school, and now it has morphed into an ear infection. No, that's not the "good thing." The good thing is how great it feels to be able to take her to the doctor and cuddle with her at home while she is sick. She had SO many ear infections (leading to tubes twice, and adenoid removal) as an infant in daycare. It bordered on ridiculous how often I had to take off work to take her to the doctor or stay home with her while she was contagious from some weird rash or virus or illness that defied definition. Not to mention the guilt on both fronts as I simultaneously felt guilty about being such a bad employee and horrible about not being able to be there as a mother as much as I would have liked. That was one of the primary reasons I quit to stay home with the kids - that awful feeling of having to choose between my child and my job. My manager never complained, and Natalie probably didn't know any better, but it still tore me up. So, pardon me now while I breathe a big sigh of relief and enjoy my time at home with my sick child. It's a good thing.

And I will stop on that blissful note, without going into too much detail about the "phase" that we are going through right now (I like to call it the "Oh NO you can't make me do ANYthing I don't want to do" phase) that makes giving medicine of any sort to Natalie more difficult than giving a sleeping pill to a cat. Yes, I've done both. The cat was slippery and noisy, but Natalie is as strong as NHL hockey player and about as fearless. I can only hope that antibiotics are good for the hair and skin. If she has a nice glossy sheen in the next picture, you'll know why.

Remembering

I hate to say it, but time gets away from me so quickly that I didn't realize what day it was until Natalie laughed and said "Look - that flag is down." I was surprised that she would even notice a difference in how the flag (at Liam's school) was hung. For a second, I had that jarring feeling of uh-oh, did something happen? Then I realized what day it was, and what it was that happened.

In some ways it is hard to believe it has been 7 years. In other ways it feels like forever (like when I tried to explain in simple terms to Liam why there were flags lining the drive to soccer practice, and he could not believe that this thing happened before he was even born).

I do remember it well. I remember hearing the news from cubicles all around me at work, as spouses called. I remember calling my Dad and having him describe the news. I remember standing around the one tv near our lobby, along with a large crowd, and watching the instant that the second tower fell, and realizing how serious this was. I remember running upstairs to email Jim, who was in London at the time. I remember barely sleeping that night, dreaming that attack planes were flying overhead. I remember the next few days of trying to figure out if Jim was coming home for our wedding that Saturday, and all the calls that had to be made when we decided he was not going to make it. I remember the strange month after that, until we did actually get married in a much smaller, quieter, more somber ceremony. Still, when I tell people our wedding story, they always comment on how hard that must have been to have to cancel and reschedule everything at the last minute. The truth of the matter is that it was a big-time reality check. All the worries about the centerpieces and the cake and the favors and the tablecloths and flowers...none of it mattered a bit. All I wanted was for Jim to come home safe and for us to be together. I was lucky enough to get that. I will always remember that, and I will always remember that day.

Still Settling

We are still settling into school routines. Tuesday was another bad drop-off for Natalie (only if you count it as "bad" when you have to pry each tiny finger off your purse strap one at a time from the death grip that the tiny hand has formed...only to find the other hand has found the other strap...and vice versa...about 6 times until the teacher finally comes to pry one hand while I pry the other...). The teachers smiled the entire time (how do they do that??) and cheerfully told me that "it's always hard after a weekend". Well, considering that she only goes on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I guess that means that I can expect 50% of my drop-offs to be horrible? On the plus side, when I picked her up, the teacher told me quite confidently that she did not cry "even once". "Not once?" "No, not once." Hmmm...she must count differently than I, because I heard many more than one before I was out the front door.

To be fair, Natalie is positively glowing when I pick her up, and quite animated trying to explain things that she did, without really knowing the right words to explain them. I think she has fun once she gives up trying to give me a huge guilt trip.

Still no picture of Natalie in her backpack. She is never happy to be photographed beforehand. I will have to try and take one after she returns.

I am the one still trying to adjust to Kindergarten. Besides getting yelled at in the carpool lane, and confusing Liam about which direction to walk, being the sweatiest mom out there by running to school (Liam has a career in track & field though - he can run the entire way, and I have to stop myself from yelling Run, Forrest, Run!!), and forgetting to send his snack, I have now caused him to forget his lunch box already. Yes, it was my fault. He was going to carry it and I stuffed it in the stroller basket instead and then forgot it. So I dropped it off at the school at 9am - plenty of time for them to get it to his class for lunch, right? Wrong. He came home that night proud of himself for buying his own lunch, and with no idea that I had rushed right over to deliver his lunch box to him. What? Didn't they bring you your lunch box? No, but that's OK, I bought a brownie for dessert!! sigh... So then I have to track down the lunch box...which one would imagine to be simple. Now I am beginning to think that either the school or, I suspect, his teacher, make this difficult intentionally in order to train parents/kids not to forget their lunch. I have been reading the parenting discipline book Love & Logic, which is all about letting kids feel the full consequences of their actions. So last night as I read the book...I realized...HEY, I think Mrs W just Love & Logic'ed ME!! I guess it worked, because tonight I was double checking everything for tomorrow. I wonder who she can train faster - me or Liam.

More School Stuff

Well, Natalie's second day of preschool last week went a tiny bit better than the first, I think. She still cried at drop-off but perhaps not ear-splitting. She even wore her red school t-shirt, and almost seemed proud of it later in the day. They did have a teddy bear picnic, with bears brought from home, so I think that helped.

Liam is enjoying Kindergarten, but I think we made an error in judgement today. After the first 2 weeks, parents are able to stop by and eat lunch with their kid in the cafeteria. Just a day past the 2 week mark, Jim decided to go for a visit. It was apparently a little too soon to mess with the new routine. Liam enjoyed seeing him for lunch, but when it was over he had tears rolling down his cheeks. I was a little surprised, since I haven't seen him shed tears over school so far. Maybe it was just too much of a reminder of the life that is going on without him while he is in school. Maybe it was just an emotional day after getting in bed too late last night. When Liam got home he made Jim promise (about 10 times- no joke) that he would NOT come to lunch again for a long time. He said he will let us know when we are allowed to visit. :-)

In less emotional, but no less disturbing, news, we caught Liam dancing the Macarena before dinner. He was very matter of fact that of course he knows how to dance the Macarena. He learned it in school. Of course. I think they do some dances while singing songs about counting, so I asked if there is a "Number Song" that goes with the dance. He said "No. Just the dance." I could see Jim's raised eyebrows...but it was very cute. I immediately looked up Macarena on YouTube to show him videos of people doing the Macarena to the actual song, and he was very impressed (although he did critique their style).

First T-ball Game

Liam had his first t-ball game tonight. The Cardinals were looking good! They don't keep score at this age, but everyone did great hitting, and Liam made a tag out. Coach Jim has done a great job getting them motivated. Go Cardinals! (Liam is #9 in the group shot - with his arms around everyone).

School Miscellaneous

Natalie's first day of pre-school went OK. She was letting out an ear-piercing scream when I left, but the teacher seemed positive when they brought her out to the car afterward. She looked like such a big girl with her backpack on, and looked quite happy at that point. (I will post a picture later- that morning she did NOT want her picture taken, and I know better than to poke a bear.) She said she had fun, and she also said she wanted to go home now. When we got home she wanted her too-small, overly-warm footed snowman pajamas on. I think she needed a little comfort. Since it is still about 97 outside, it didn't last too long.

Liam had a homework assignment from Kindergarten last night, where he was supposed to finish the sentence "One thing I want to learn this year is...." His answer was "how things work". So I asked what kind of things, and he said "like electrical boxes." :-) :-)

Awwwww...now that brought back memories. Before he could walk, and all he wanted to play with was eletrical cords of any sort (an old stereo receiver with the audio cords to plug in and out was heaven)...when he first started drawing real "things" and he would draw a box with lots of circles and dashes on it and tell me it was an electrical box...all the things every young boy does (??). It is true, he has always had a fascination with those things. I can honestly say that telling me "learning to read" was probably not even in his Top 10. We'll see what his teacher has to say. I really must ask her to add this to the Kindergarten curriculum.