Control Issues

We're having some issues of control around here lately. Specifically, with Natalie. She has had a hard time returning to preschool after the holiday, and then this past week she refused to do her gymnastics class. I know, gymnastics isn't a requirement at 3. The thing is, I really do think she enjoys it, and the exercise does her some good. But right at the moment she is in a big "let's see what you can make me do" period. So she sat down on the floor and cried and wailed and refused to go with the rest of her class. Several teachers tried to coax her, but that only made her cling to me more. So we sat and watched her friends do their gymnastics, and I thought maybe she would get bored and want to finally join them, but NO. Her wonderful teacher, Coach Debbie, also quit teaching this age group, so that may have contributed to this issue.

Now I'm in a quandary. It is impossible to force her to do gymnastics (not to mention pointless), and I'm paying way too much for it to let her sit and watch her friends. But I really don't want her to think that all she has to do is throw herself on the floor and cry and she won't have to do anything. At least with preschool, I can leave her there and walk away if she tries to pull a tantrum like that.

I just don't know...I guess we'll see how she does this week. Hopefully she won't feel the need for "control" this week. If she does, I suppose we'll look into taking a break from gymnastics for a while (even though we would have to get back on a waiting list for her to rejoin). I don't mind some of the many battles for control in other areas...but it is a shame she might end something that has been fun for her. A little taste of what will come as she becomes pre-teen, I suppose, and wants to do only the opposite of what I think she should do. sigh....I had been so looking forward to taking more home video too...

I might have to try Jim's approach. After years of practically begging for affection from her, he finally (duh!) realized that all he has to say is "Oh no, Natalie, please don't give me a hug or kiss!" and she will come running and smother him with hugs and kisses. So I could try on Wednesday, saying "Oh Natalie, you don't want to go to gymnastics do you? I really would rather go shopping!" Why do I have the feeling that my reverse psychology will only backfire though...I can picture her saying "Yeah! Me too!" and then I will be left to wonder why I cannot outsmart a 3 yr old.