Fishy

Swimming is the task of the month for Owen. Given that we voted him Most Likely To Hurl Himself Into the Deep End of The Pool, I signed him up for the swim/float/swim baby survival swim class. They don't expect them to be doing fantastic strokes at 2, of course, but they try to teach them to turn onto their backs to get air and then to turn around and try to move through the water to a destination (ie., the side of the pool or something they can grab onto). Liam did it at age 4, and it worked pretty well for him. Natalie tried it at age 2 and after 6 or 7 weeks (did I mention 4 days a week, 10 minutes a day) of tortuous screaming and clinging, the instructor gave up (and I was so relieved to stop- it was brutal). I do think it is a good idea for Owen, but I'm not without my reservations. I stayed in the pool for the first 3 days so that he would know I was there, but then she suggested I let him go in without me. He cries. Some days more than others. But he still high fives the teacher after he floats or turns or kicks well. She thinks he is doing really well, and is almost there in terms of doing it on his own. I want him to trust her...but don't know how much I want him to bond with her, for reasons of attachment.

I was a little squeamish...squirmy...uncomfortable...today. I realized that when he is floating he puts his hands behind his neck (you know, like on the cop shows when they arrest someone and say put down your weapon and put your hands behind your head). I asked the teacher if she showed him to do that and she said "No, it would actually be better for floating if he kept his arms out straight, but if he feels more comfortable this way, that's fine." It was strangely reminiscent of his early days home when he would "assume the position" for dinner. We assume that whenever he was spoon fed at the orphanage that they would make them put their hands behind their heads so there was no grabbing at spoons, etc. He doesn't do it anymore when we eat. But it made me a little sad seeing him do it in the pool...somehow it looks too much like a position of submission. Like "I'm only doing this because you're forcing me." Or maybe I was just emotional today. I do think he likes the water and is going to be an early swimmer. We're all about survival here. I know he has a strong survival instinct, so I'm hoping by giving him the tools, he'll use them if the situation arises. Meanwhile, we may need to go to the pool for some fun stuff soon, just to lighten it up a bit. I am proud of my swimmer boy though. (I don't let him wear the goggles for lessons, since they'd just get in the way, but he LOVES to wear them around the house and on the way to lessons). And the most favorite part is the sucker he gets at the end. All the time now he says "Swim. Cindy (teacher's name). Sucker."

Photo Shoot

So, as I mentioned before, I haven't had a professional photo taken of all the kids together yet. Liam and Natalie have their school/preschool pictures, so I do have individuals of them. I decided to do my own shot of Owen to at least have something to frame. I can't really go wrong with his adorable little face, I think. But I really do need to take him somewhere for pictures soon or else I will have to get rid of our master bedroom furniture in a few years when he starts to ask "Mom, why do all MY pictures have the same brown background...hey wait a minute...that looks exactly like your headboard..."

I also can't believe how much older he is looking these days. Oh, those days between 2 and 3...how they grow up so fast. Slow down, slow down!!

Earth Day

Is it bad of me on Earth Day to re-wash an entire load of clothes that I just washed a day or two ago? The one that I forgot was in the wash, so today when I opened up the washer it smelled like a wet dog? And I know for a fact that if I just throw the clothes in the dryer with two Bounce sheets that the moldy smell will stay in the clothes. And I know this for a fact because this is far from the first time I've done this. Is that bad? On Earth Day and all? Do I need to cut out my shower today to make up for it? Do I need to choose between smelly clothes or smelly me? Oh wait...I was late getting up today so I didn't shower. Problem solved. Smelly me. Never mind...

The Great Outdoors is Overrated

I'm not sure what about taking outdoor pictures sounds so appealing. Nature, children, what could go wrong? Hmmm...maybe the pokey grass, random cactus, bees, and young eyes that apparently have been living in a dark closet for years because they will not...cannot...open even slightly when the sun is shining. So I have a whole series of pictures where all three look like they are in serious pain. The one bright spot was - how cute does Owen look in that little shirt (overlooking the stain please)? He looked like a little man. And I did like the shot of him trying to walk through tall grass, and lifting his feet really high. I was hoping to update my header picture with a Spring shot, but no luck yet. I prefer to see their eyes...

Just a Few Notes

Mr. Cool with a new "do". The spiky stuff didn't stay long though. When he got home he asked if it was OK if he "smashed it down again." I thought it was cute spiky.

The lovely Miss N. I take lots of pictures of her. And I blog about her. Doesn't that count for something?! She has been browsing through Liam's baby book of his first two years that I scrapbooked. You know, back when I had ONE child, and a neighbor who hosted scrapbooking parties where she would design the page FOR us and we just had to cut and assemble it. Yeah, those were the days. Anyhow...Natalie most unfortunately found this book the other day. And wanted to know where HER book was. So I showed it to her. I did actually buy the book itself. I just haven't quite completed...the first page. She was not impressed. So she has now drawn and colored two different princess pictures for me to put inside her book. She told me yesterday that she was going to help me finish it tomorrow by coloring more pictures for it. "We can do it together," she said. The guilt. The GUILT. The poor girl feels like she must color pictures to fill out her own baby book because Mommy won't scrapbook pages with her actual picture on them. aaagggh I'd better get crackin' on that too, because it won't be long before Owen is demanding to see his. I swear I caught him counting how many pictures of each kid is hanging on the wall. I do have some pictures of him hanging, but none that are professional shots because I haven't had his photo done professionally yet. The guilt. The GUILT.

And this picture is titled "aaaahh the beginning of short season." Good for the tan...not so good for the boo-boos. At least long pants provided some protection from skinned knees. Luckily, I've discovered that bandaids and Boo Boo Kitty (a cold pack in the shape of Hello Kitty that we keep in the freezer) are the cure-alls for everything. If Owen gets any boo-boo at all, real or imagined, he immediately either asks for a bandaid or he runs to the freezer yelling "boo boo" and grabs himself some Boo Boo Kitty. Cures everything.

Adoption Blogger Day

Well, there have certainly been a lot of Russian adoption headlines recently, and not in a good way. The latest incident sparking the headlines was the return of a 7 yr old Russian boy adopted by an American woman. She just put him on a plane to Moscow alone, with a note in his backpack. I won't go into it much, other than to say that I find it a bizarre story. I've certainly read many agonizing Russian adoption stories since we started our own adoption process. I was obsessed for a while, reading the good, bad, and ugly. Never quite read one like this, however. Not sure how that ever would have seemed a good idea. There are so many other options. But the good news, I suppose, is that no one was killed, as was the case in some other stories. It is still very sad.

One positive that came out of that story is how the adoption community has come together so quickly to try and show Russia, and the US for that matter, that this story was an isolated incident and not the norm. A campaign was started called We Are The Truth, and a petition was signed by over 20,000 people who want Russia to know that they think this was not a typical story, was a terrible thing to happen, and that there are many successful adoptions out there. Today has also been deemed Adoption Blogger day, when everyone is supposed to tell their successful adoption story.

So this is mine. Our adoption was/is successful. No doubt about it. Easy? No. Quick adjustment period? Depends on your idea of quick. We had a good six months of frayed nerves, upset children (not just from Russia), and plenty of crying, screaming, craziness. We're better now. Not perfect, of course. The circumstances of our son's first 19 months have left their mark, in some ways more subtle than others. It's not something we think about every day, however. Mostly I just think of it as part and parcel of who he is. Nine months after bringing him home, he is such an important part of our family. He is enthusiastic, energetic, smart, funny, strong, and charismatic. He is loving and affectionate, and I have to believe that he had people in his life, in the orphanage, who showed him love and affection. I believe they truly cared about him. The day we left the summer home with Owen, a sweet young caregiver rode with us into town, and as she got out of the van to walk to the bus station she held my hand, looked me in the eye and told me in English "I am happy." even as she was starting to cry. I'm very grateful for her, and for all those who watched out for him before me. I absolutely could not love him more.

One of the more surprising things about adopting has been the joy it has brought. Of course I expected to feel joy about a new baby in the family. But the joy I'm referring to is different. When I was a young woman (a long time ago...) there were times when I didn't have much faith in people. In fact, I would say I was not sure if bringing a child into the world was even that great of an idea. All very dramatic, I know, for someone with a perfectly fine childhood and life. Still, I was very cynical. I think having children changed that a lot. It definitely gave me hope for the future, and a deeper joy than I'd ever experienced. But I think that seeing unending possibilities in your biological children is somewhat to be expected. I mean, you know that you are a decent person, so of course you expect to feel that your children are as well. What I've discovered with Owen is that I feel the exact same way about a child not of my own gene pool. Yes, I'm sure I more or less expected to feel this way, or I would not have considered adoption. But I can honestly say that looking into Owen's beautiful eyes and seeing his innocence, his joy, his love, his enthusiasm for life, despite all that he has endured already, gave me a greater sense of hope and joy. Strange, perhaps, because it could have made me bitter about his early trauma, or more cynical after seeing an orphanage with 400 children and knowing there are so many more. But it didn't. Instead, it has filled me with a soaring hope as I see the world through, or maybe in, my son's eyes. I can see his endless possibilities, his potential for goodness and capacity for love. And he didn't come from me. This belief that all children have such a huge potential has changed my outlook. Anything is possible. Yes, I know that all sorts of things could go wrong. He could make terrible choices in life and not fulfill the possibilities that I see. That can and does happen to all of us because we're human. But it won't take away my joy at knowing that we all start out with such potential. The beauty and hope in a young life has renewed my faith in humanity, it seems, come what may.

Fun in the Sun

Of all the pictures I've taken of Owen smiling (and I've taken a LOT), I'm not sure I've seen one yet that matches the look of pure joy on his face above, as he is jumping on his brother. Still practicing for a future career in football, he loves to throw himself around Liam's knees and knock him to the ground and then climb on top and bounce (while I sit around yelling out useless directives like "Not so hard - you'll break a rib!". Liam is such a good sport. For some odd reason, he seems to really enjoy the beating, or uh, roughhousing. Natalie...not so much. But she doesn't scream as much anymore. She generally just pushes him off and gets back up. All three of them have been having a grand time chasing each other and playing in the yard. Now my only issue is how to explain to Owen that he can't play this way with all children...only siblings. I think he gets it, sometimes. But older kids are kind of fair game in his mind, and they have to watch out for his tackle and climb maneuver. Especially if it is unexpected, he can really bring them down quickly. Low center of gravity, I suppose. Maybe wrestling is in his future. On a school wrestling team, please. I'm still praying no professional wrestling as a career.

Together

I love the top picture of Natalie and Owen playing together at the park. It is hard to get a shot of him without the "cheese" face, for one thing. And I just love the look that Natalie is giving him. I think it looks very tender. In reality, she is probably just realizing that he is going to push past her and go down the steps in front of her and she is calculating how much effort it will take to knock him down. But I'm deciding that I will remember it as a tender, protective look during a moment of exploring together.

The next shot is of the two of them watching a teenage couple fly a kite. Both kids were very interested. Then the last picture shows Owen flying the kite. He has a way of getting in the middle of everything somehow. The teenage boy was actually very nice and asked both of the kids if they wanted to fly it. Natalie turned away and wouldn't look at him, of course (not that I mind this behavior around teenage boys, really...) and You Know Who ran up and grabbed the handle from the boy and went to town. Yes, I had to more or less wrestle it back out of his hand later. He was ready to fly that kite home.

Baseball!

Thought I'd post some baseball pictures in honor of Opening Day. The Cardinals are looking good this year. In particular, I like #9, and one of his biggest fans who decked herself out in red for the game. Coach Jim is so over the top excited about how much improved they are this year, that I think he might be considering quitting his job to be a full-time coach of 6 yr old baseball. Very. Excited.

Happy Easter

And the eggs were finally colored! Owen is making a face because he declared that the eggs were kinky (stinky). We're never all that creative with eggs, but the kids enjoy it anyway. Natalie did have some fairy dust to sprinkle on hers, and have to say, I could do without tiny flecks of glitter all over the kitchen.

Owen seemed to understand perfectly what that chocolate bunny in his basket was for. I guess he knows chocolate when he sees it. He was begging to open it as soon as he saw his basket. And they all did well with the egg hunting. Liam was very sweet pointing out to Owen all the spots to look. Liam's basket was almost empty, but he was making sure that Owen found a lot.

Happy Easter from all our sweet bunnies!

Getting Artsy

I just realized I have no Easter egg painting pictures to post yet, because we haven't painted eggs yet! Where does the time go... But here are a few of the budding artists painting pictures last week. Owen is better at painting now. I'm not really afraid he'll eat it anymore. He does prefer to play in the water cup and just paint with water on the page, but sometimes he can get a nice blurry effect that way. Natalie likes to layer her art. She made handprints on the page first, then painted entirely over them in yellow, and then put purple spots on the top. She always has liked layering. When she was very little she would paint the cutest little pictures and then before I could save them, she'd take a dark color and paint over the entire picture so it was one solid color. I wonder if that says something about her personality...the secret painting inside the solid color.